Barnes H3 Mismanagement Election 2024 – Astonishing Results


This was a very close run election with final results relying on in-person, postal, email, internet and carrier pigeon votes.


Grand Master / Mattress

The position of GM appeared to have been won by Count Bin Face much to OITEÕs disbelief and she was right. It turned out several of his votes were sent in by the local primary school and in the end OITE triumphed by one!


Join Masters / Mattresses

Lionale (Lionel recently re-named) was elected Joint Master and Birthing Blanket Joint Mattress once Stormy Daniels had been disqualified on popularity grounds.


On Sex positions

ChatbotAI was asked what essential quality was required for the position of Hash Trash and replied that oily fish is a vital ingredient in a healthy diet so Kipper was elected.

Fetherlite remains as Trail Mailer since there were no other takers.


Hash Cash

Although both the Post Office Legal team and Thames Water had thrown their hats in the ring, no one could cope with the reek of sewage so, to great applause, Double Entry G.E.A. retained his position. G.E.A. = Good Egg Award which he got because he is.


Religious Advisers

None of the jokes told by Jimmy Carr, Nicola Sturgeon or Taylor Swift were up to scratch so Layby, Legolas and Scud were duly appointed.


Hare Razor (and True Story Teller)

No contest really: D F(lake) Trump didnÕt even bother to campaign so by popular acclaim Specky was re-elected.


Hasherdasher / Awards

Well, he was warned that if he insisted on fleeing to North America for the AGM he might be elected to everything but in the end weÕve kept Stonker as Hasherdasher/Awards. He is rather good at it.


Upstanding Member

Hash Flash slid in by one vote.


Upstanding Member Support

The voting on this was unanimous: Proxy. (HF claims heÕs not in the least bit worried).